Can we get that to-go?

We've been down this road before. The warning signs are there. We are approaching the end of eating at restaurants with Sam. We went through this phase with Ian and couldn't go out to eat with him for about 8 months. It just becomes too stressful and no one enjoys it; not us, not the wait staff and certainly, not the customers around us.

I look around at other families with toddler-aged children and I don't know how their kids can sit there so calmly waiting for their food or their parents to finish eating, or even for the check to arrive. It must be genetic because my parents never get tired telling me that when I was a baby, my dad would eat his food super fast and then take me outside while the rest of the family enjoyed their meal.

Jeff and I figured we've got 40 minutes from the minute we walk in the door of a restaurant to the minute we need to be walking back out. Our strategy we developed with Ian and now implement with Sam, goes something like this -

1. We only pick extremely child-friendly restaurants...think balloons, loud noise and usually a tv screen or two surrounding us. Our most favorite places we'll go with the kids include: Glory Days, Red Robin, Champps, Rio Grande, and Ho's Dynasty (not sure why, but we've always had a wonderful experience with the kids doing Chinese). We've gone to many other restaurants, many times (Villa Bella, Cheesecake Factory, Coastal Flats, Maggiano's, etc), that are kid-friendly, but the stress level for Jeff & I most definitely rises, because Sam needs to be on the quiet side. The noise level in the restaurant isn't loud enough to drown her out.

2. We try to arrive right at the 5:00pm hour. This is before real hunger sets in with the kids and we haven't ruined their appetite giving them lots of snacks.

3. Before we walk in the door, we pretty much already know what we will be ordering. Why waste precious time looking at the menu?

4, As soon as the waiter comes by asking us what we would like to drink, we tell them we are ready to order. We also add that as soon as the kids' food is ready, please bring it out. And, if we ordered an appetizer, we throw in that we don't need that first, just bring out whatever is ready as it is done.

5. When the food gets brought to the table, we tell the waiter we are ready for the check. We also anticipate any to-go box needs and ask for the container then too.

6. We pay the check usually halfway through the meal. This way if we need to make a quick escape, we are ready to do so.

Even with the strategy in play, we still have to juggle a very squirmy toddler and figure out what tricks we can do to keep her happy. It gets harder and harder the more she wants to move around and explore. With Ian, we had to take an 8 month hiatus from eating out and then it was like a switch had gone on and he was safe to take out in public again. We've now entered this same stage with Samantha. At least we know having lived through this before, that it is only a stage, and once we get through it, it will be enjoyable again for everyone at the other side.

Until then, we will just have to be content with Panera Bread, Cosi, and other fast food places that give you your food as soon as you order. At least this stage we have now entered is budget-friendly.

The Benadryl Experiment

Our flight back home was today and I knew I needed to take drastic measures to avoid another experience like we had coming down 10 days prior. Completely against my mom and stepmother's wishes (they both made it abundantly clear how horrible of an idea this was), I decided to give Sam a dosage of Benadryl in the hopes of knocking her out on the airplane.

A few people told me that I should try it out in advance to make sure it doesn't have the opposite effect and make her super-hyper. When I gave her the test dose a few days prior about 1 hour before her regular nap time, it did nothing to alter the nap one way or another. It didn't cause her to fall asleep any faster, and it didn't make her sleep any longer than usual. It also didn't cause her to not fall asleep. So I figured maybe by giving her the Benadryl, it will take the edge off and cause her to be a little less "joyful" and hopefully be content hanging out in the car seat while flying.

I do have to mention that the flight crew and passengers on this flight were much more helpful than before. As I was boarding and nearing my row, a man 3 rows back jumped out of his seat and came to my rescue asking what he could do to help. I would love to thank his mom and tell her she did a good job raising him. The only thing I could give him at that moment to help was Samantha. He was a good sport holding her as I quickly tried to get the car seat off my back and adjusted in the seat.

And, I am happy to report that two of the flight attendants helped me strap in the car seat. Something that never happened on the flight down. No one even checked to see if her seat was strapped in.

I am not sure why we got on the plane so early. I didn't realize just how much time we still had before take-off. Rule number 1 in my book is try to board as late as possible. As long as you already have assigned seats (meaning, you are not flying Southwest), getting the kids strapped in their seats waiting out the rest of boarding is a bad idea. We were seated on the plane and ready for take-off at 3:30pm for a 4:00pm air time. Jeez!! And, we were one of the last on board too. So we basically just sat there until 3:55pm when they shut the door and began take-off procedures. So not cool in my book! If I had my watch on (it ended up getting left behind in my mom's car when I was trying to keep Sam entertained with it on the way to the airport), I would've realized what was going on. It wasn't until I called Jeff from the plane and saw the time on the cell phone. When you have a limited amount of time on how good your child is going to be, you want it to count when you are actually in the air, not sitting on the ground going nowhere.

I have to say that Ian was a rockstar. I am even willing to put it out there that I would fly with him anywhere, even flights longer than 2 hours. As long as he isn't getting drenched in orange juice, he was very well behaved and was very mindful of when the iPod Touch needed to be turned off. Every time the pilot made an announcement Ian asked if that meant it was time for him to turn it off.

Sam, on the other hand, has a long way to go. I fear we are in for the same bumpy ride we had previously with Ian. The biggest issue was the shrieking. It is a loud, very high pitched scream that I am sure would be considered a form of torture in some interrogation tactics. It can produce instant headaches and make you wish you were deaf if you were sitting next to her. Sam has managed to perfect this shriek with and without a mouthful of food. And, I can't imagine it is for the sole purpose of getting attention because she shrieks when I play with her and when I try to ignore she is doing it. Sam shrieked on and off consistently the whole time we were in the air!!!

After about an hour, she had enough of the car seat and wanted to get out. Fortunately the guy behind us started making faces at her and she loved that. There was a young girl sitting in the seat in front us and they were checking each other out in the space between the seats. And, of course the poopy diaper needing to be changed took up another 5 minutes. In all my 4 years of flying with the kids, this was the first time I changed a diaper in the plane's bathroom. I have to say, it wasn't that bad.

I am happy to report that I survived the flight home. I didn't even feel like crying when it was time to get off the plane. We had a great time in Orlando, but I am happy to be home. I can breathe easier knowing that when we do this trip again in just 6 weeks, I will have Jeff with me to assist. We've already decided we are going to sit in different rows and each take one kid. I think that will help greatly. Sam was still throwing toys at Ian. I was watching her do it...she very innocently looked straight ahead and took a toy and flung it in his direction on purpose. Ian was still not pleased by this, but at least this time he didn't yell at his sister, he just threw it to me in the hopes I wouldn't give it back to her to play with.

And, I've come to the sad realization that Benadryl has no effect whatsoever on Samantha. It doesn't calm her and it doesn't make her overly excited. I guess in some way this is a good thing. I need to face the fact that it took Ian until he was 4 to be able to fly without giving me an anxiety attack afraid we will get kicked off the plane and just like his little sister, I fear I still have another 3 years to go with her too. Jeff thinks that Sam might be more 'spirited' than Ian and has just been holding back until now. If I wasn't so tired right now writing this, I'd be freaked out by that thought.

The Dark Weeks

Whenever there is no preschool or camp scheduled, I refer to the newfound free time as my "dark" period. There are dark days (such as school holidays) and dark weeks (such as when Spring Break or the time between Christmas and New Year's occurs).

We are currently in week 3 of a five week long dark period. Camp has ended and it is officially a little longer than a month before the new school year starts. Normally I'd be frightened by this downtime, but not anymore.

The first week went incredibly well and was easily filled with playdates of all types. During week one we had a pool party and ordered pizza for lunch on Monday. Tuesday was a playgroup at one of Ian's "best pals" home. Wednesday was a wonderful morning of outdoor play (think moonbounce, sprinkler, whale pool, & ice cream sundaes), Thursday found us at a traditional one-on-one playdate at another of Ian's "best pals" home and Friday was a greatly anticipated trip to Chuck E. Cheese.

Weeks 2 and 3 find us in Orlando hanging with the family. Throw in 3 days at the beach, a bowling birthday party for one of Ian's Florida buddies, a fishing trip with Pop-pop Jim, hanging with Dad and Rita a few days, and before you know it, it will be time to go back home. When we get back to NoVa, we will only have 2 weeks to go.

For the most part I've really been enjoying my time spent with Ian* (*see note below). He is cracking me up and a joy to be around -- that is when he gets enough sleep. His enthusiasm for our activities is contagious and I am having as much fun as him getting out and about for our playdates. Sam does her best to go with the flow and adjusted some what well to having her nap drastically change from 10:00am to something resembling the 1:00pm hour. She is a trooper!

I've come to realize that these carefree days of summer won't last long and to treasure the time and freedom I have with the kids. While it is always nice to have a plan, and know Ian is being entertained and busy, my remaining dark days aren't looking so dark. In fact it is quite bright and now requires the use of sunglasses.

*Just so know one thinks he is completely temper tantrum free, we've had a few real humdingers during our stay in Orlando. :)

The passing of the torch

Whenever I was in town, I used to be my dad's buddy to hop in the car with him and run errands...home depot, the post office, bank, 7-11, whatever was a 'quick stop' and then head back home to the family. It was never that exciting, but it was nice getting some one-on-one time with just my dad. And, wherever we stopped if there was anything I could ever want at one of these stops, it was put in the cart faster than I could bat an eye. I'm not talking big ticket items, more like gum, magazines, and candy bars.

I think I've officially been replaced by my son Ian. On Saturday morning Ian was the one to go with my dad to get fresh bagels and cream cheese for the gang back at home. On Sunday, Ian was the one to go with my dad to the grocery store to get the makings for french toast.

It happened as naturally as it had always been done this way. Dad came down the stairs from his bedroom, saw Ian dressed in clothes and said, "Ian, put your shoes on and come with me to get bagels." Ian didn't question it and happily followed my dad out the door. The next morning, the same thing. Reports came back that Ian even helped my dad show him where to find the eggs at the grocery store.

It was a bittersweet moment for me to know I've been replaced. I hope that Ian treasures these errands with my dad as much as I have over the years. It's the day to day, ordinary things that make it special.

A vision in white.

My sister Lori is getting married in October. We threw a bridal shower yesterday for her at a lovely restaurant in Winter Park. It was a beautiful setting and the food was delicious. The wait staff and event planner at the restaurant went overboard in serving us and made sure everything was perfect. I found a wonderful bakery to make a gorgeous cake that tasted as good as it looked (think chocolate with peanut butter cream -- yum!!). We had two fun activities to do at the table - 1. using only various colors of play-doh make a wedding gown on a 6x8 card stock. Lori judged the top 3 designs for prizes. And, 2. On a heart shaped construction paper attached to a green pipe cleaner (to look like a flower) write down advice for the bride. Lori then read aloud each of our words of wisdom for her to live by in her soon-to-be married life with Ben. She can then take these 'flowers' home in the vase provided as a keepsake.

I even found these adorable, miniature black patent leather purses that opened to reveal a manicure set that made a great, useful favor; which had the ladies in attendance excited to put in their purse.

I wanted everything to be perfect because I know that Lori deserves this more than anything. She has been an amazing sister to me my whole life and I feel so fortunate to have been able to do this for her (along with my team of co-hosts).

To everyone who made the trip to come to the party and celebrate in Lori's pre-wedding festivities, THANK YOU!! I know it meant the world to Lori to have you there and it made my day to be able to include you.

I am close to feeling like the plane trip from hell to get here was worth the angst for how incredibly well the bridal shower was. Everything I envisioned played out perfectly.

Fortunately my other sister Meghan is only 17 and I have more than a few years before I need to host a bridal shower for her and take this flight again with 2 kids by myself. Although, now that I think about this, if Lori and Ben move as quickly as Jeff & I did on starting a family, I could easily be back in 9 months for a baby shower. Maybe so they don't regret their decision, I leave the kids at home with Jeff. :)

Hungry?

My sweet little girl has a very generous nature about her and likes to share her food. She will eat a piece of whatever it is on her plate and while chewing on it, pick up another piece and put it in your mouth for you to eat. She will actually put the entire piece she is feeding you all the way in your mouth. It is a bit hard to resist and not something you can easily say no to because it is so cute and sweet. Normally this is not a problem and since she is only eating regular, people food, you can't really go wrong getting a sample.

However, the other night, right before we left for our trip, we went to Glory Days for dinner and Sam took her 'sharing' a bit too far. Her meal came with a side of vegetables, which were carrots and broccoli. The carrots were the miniature kind and not cooked nearly enough for her to be able to chew. I only put the broccoli on her plate and decided against giving her the carrots. Sam's new thing is she'll start off eating sitting down, but prefers to really chow down standing up. It's a little strange, but for the most part harmless as we find ourselves in a booth when it seems to occur. So, with Sam standing next to me, she reaches over and gets herself a carrot. She manages to take a bite and really works hard to break it down and swallow it. Jeff and I were impressed. Sam then goes back and now puts the rest of the carrot in her mouth and begins to work on this piece. It was much bigger than I was comfortable with her having in her mouth and watched her like a hawk to make sure she didn't choke. After a full five minutes, she decides this is too much work and takes the carrot out of her mouth and puts it back on the plate.

Sam moves on to eating a piece of chicken tender and then proceeds to pick up the piece of carrot and try to feed it to me. Yes, this is the same piece that was in her mouth for a good 5 minutes. YUCK! I had just been fed some chicken and broccoli by her, but I had to draw the line at food she had been previously working on.

There isn't much I wouldn't do for her, but that was crossing the line. I am still grossed out by thinking about this. This piece of carrot was all mangled, soggy and the end was shredded where she managed to eat some. I guess Samantha felt like someone should at least enjoy it.

Next time I think I'll let Jeff sit next to her.

The GREAT clean-out of '09

Whew! It was a lot of work, but well worth the effort. I managed to finish just hours before leaving for the airport for our trip to Florida. Leave it to my husband to point out the obvious (more than a few times) that packing for the trip should be more important than continuing my obsession with finishing my HUGE decluttering project and I needed to stop. Unfortunately the urge to clean and organize coincided when Ian's camp ended. So of course everything took longer than it should. It took me 3 days on the kitchen and I must've filled up 3 big trash bags with stuff to throw out and two bins of stuff to donate. The rest of the rooms went a little faster as there isn't physically that much space to hold as much.

Some of the highlights from The GREAT clean-out of '09:

Found a box of tea that had expired in 1996. If it expired in 1996, then how long ago did I originally acquire it?!?!?

Got rid of Tylenol Cold that expired in 2002. And with one dose left in the box, how many had we used that were past its prime?

Hey, has anyone seen a "D" or "O" magnetic letter? I now know that we are only missing those two keeping us from a full set.

Got rid of every sock that didn't have a match. By now I've given up hope that the washing machine was going to give them back.

Threw out all of Sam's clothing that is stained and has no hope of looking presentable again or would feel good about giving to a charity. (And yes Mom, I tried Oxy Clean first.)

Got rid of every pair of underwear that I'd be embarassed to be caught in a car accident with and the paramedics having to see what was covering my butt. We're talking more than 10 years on some of these pairs. I did discover some nice underwear that hadn't been worn (EVER!) under the pairs that I had been wearing too much!

Went through every hat, scarf and gloves set for the kids and only kept the ones that will still fit them this Winter. There must've been a heckuva sale at one point because we have about 5 sets that are are no longer the right size for Ian and is too boyish for Sam to grow into.

I even hosted book club one evening and was able to give to every guest who wanted one a bottle or two of wine. Jeff and I aren't going to drink it and as long as the girls understood that the wine could've turned to vinegar by now, they were game to give it a try. Reports have come back that some of the wine was still good (and tasty!). Although it was a pretty funny remark when Terri said, "why get rid of the wine? It's not like you can put something else in that space, it is only supposed to hold bottles of wine."

Buh-bye to all my CD's and VHS movies. We don't have a VCR anymore and all my music is loaded on iTunes. Got to love the electronic age.

Recycled the phone books on the shelf above the coat closet...seriously, who uses phone books anymore!??!?

Scary to think that most of this stuff moved in with us. Probably would have made the load for the movers a lot lighter if this clean-out occured before moving. And to think that I had so much more time on my hands back then too before kids. I seriously wonder what I did with it all that extra time.

Next up: The car.