Putting Sam to bed each night while in FL was not a day at the beach. She fought me tooth and nail on going to sleep. I started taking away reading her a story, using her iPad the next day and so on in the hopes she would get in bed and stay there. I scream and tell her in a very loud, stern voice - "DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR AGAIN!!". She stays inside the room and bangs and screams to no end. Finally exhaustion sets in and she collapses against the door. Then I need to push the door away, moving her body with it so that I can squeeze in and move her to bed.
One evening I did something I never thought I'd do. I spanked her. I am not perfect. Far from it. Sam was taunting me and pushing all my buttons. I had already taken her iPad use away for the next day as well as reading her a book at bedtime. I pulled out the big guns and threatened with spanking her if she got out of bed again. I wasn't 2 feet away when she said, "I'm out of bed" in a sing-songy voice. I had to go through with my threat and I spanked her. Ugh. I hate that I did that. And I hate even more that I am now resorting to threatening spanking to get her to behave. Isn't there a better way?
Fortunately, all reports from Florida is that she is doing great for my family and going to bed easily. They aren't having any of the issues I had. And when she gets back to town, Jeff can take over again putting her to bed each night. This is my idea of a happily ever after.
I read this with a heavy heart - not because you spanked but because you are feeling the burden for being a human being. You show more devotion and compassion than anyone I know and you are doing your best. It won't hurt her, it won't damage her and I am hoping you give yourself a break. I know it was hard - THIS is gut wrenching...when our kids are challenging on any level, it's felt viscerally. This I know...move on, rise above it and hug yourself for doing the impossible with love, class and poise. xoxoo
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