Stranger danger.

As of this week, I can safely say that I am more advanced than Ian when it comes to social media websites like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc.  Ian doesn't use or communicate on any of these sites, so without a doubt, I know I am more aware of how they work and what happens when you go online.  As Ian is only 10 years old, this is the way it should be.  But I don't know how much longer this will be the case or what the next big thing will be that Ian participates in and I'm just a bystander.

The Xbox is a different story.  I can barely get our tv downstairs to change back to regular tv watching or switch to the wii.  Ian is the expert and the one we all look to for help.  The other morning I was walking by the family room while Ian was playing on the xbox.  Ian was wearing his headset and I could hear him having a conversation with someone.  I asked him who he was speaking with and he looked at me, shrugged his shoulders and whispered "I don't know who he is."   WHAT?!?!?!?!?

I thought for sure Ian was playing the game and on the other end of his headset was one of his friends or his cousin Max playing the same game at their house.  Within seconds of quickly realizing that a random stranger connected with Ian (through the xbox gaming system), I asked Ian for his headset.  I put it on and had a few words with the guy on the other end.

Me:  Hello?
Guy on the other end (now known as "GOTOE"):  Hi.
Me:  Who is this??
GOTOE:  Justin
Me:  Justin, this is the mom of the boy you are playing with.  How old are you?
GOTOE:  I'm 19.
Me:  I want you to know my son is 10.  He is 10 years old.  Please do not use bad language when you talk to him.
GOTOE:  Ok. 
Meanwhile, Ian is telling me that this guy has never used bad words.
Me:  I am going to put you back on with my son. 
GOTOE:  Ok.

And with that, I was freaking out.  OMG!  Doesn't this online communicating with strangers start later, like when Ian is a teenager?  I wasn't sure if it was ok to let Ian continue to talk to this guy.  I needed Jeff's perspective on the situation.  I called Jeff at work and filled him in.  He too, was surprised that Ian was playing people he didn't know.  We decided that Ian has a good head on his shoulders and we will trust him.  HOWEVER, we will have a big conversation with him on the dangers of speaking with strangers.  We were going to talk to him after dinner.

I couldn't wait that long and when Ian was done playing with the game, we started the conversation on how dangerous this could be.  It turns out that Ian had connected with this kid before. Fortunately there had been no one else he didn't know.   Ian told me that he made his last name invisible and this guy could only see the nickname xbox uses.  Ian also said he never told the guy how old he was or what his name was.  I felt a little better after hearing this, but I was still shaken.  Especially after earlier in the week, it was all over the news about a 13 year old girl who was killed after meeting a guy online who goes to Virginia Tech.

Jeff and I had a very in-depth conversation with Ian later that night.  Every time I walk by the family room and Ian is chatting with someone on his headset and playing xbox, I ask him who he is on with.  I will never stop doing this.

The thing that gets me is, at some point, Ian is going to be way smarter than me with the technology.  He is going to know how to work it better than me.  I have a feeling we are only a few years away from this happening.  Already, I can't get the xbox to do things Ian can make it do.  If Jeff and I want to watch a movie on it, we need Ian to take off the parental controls and help us launch Netflix.  Ha!  It's a very scary world out there.  I only hope we can teach the kids to be cautious, and have their guard up, but still not lose their innocence of being only 10.