I am ready to admit this now. I am still a little bitter over Ian not having full day kindergarten, but I am really enjoying my time with him on Tuesday and Thursday mornings. After we've dropped Sam off at preschool, it is just the two of us until 11:40am. That's a little more than 2 hours of some quality time together. I try to book all my dr appts, run errands, go to my weekly weight watchers weigh-in/meeting, get eyebrows waxed during these mornings when I don't have Sam with me. It's better for all concerned. Ian has become my little buddy and regularly rises to the challenge of being dragged all about town.
After one trip to Costco:
I am in the midst of unloading the car;
Ian: Here let me help you, it will make it easier.
Me: Wow, thanks Ian. That is awesome. Take this. (I give him the lightest item - 3 cereal holder Tupperware containers. They are empty! ).
Ian: I need some help! This is heavy.
*************************************************
After my last Weight Watchers meeting:
Ian: Wow, that was a quick half hour.
***********************************************
Don't get me wrong, for most of the places we go, I bring the iTouch and Ian does a wonderful job of sitting next to me, happily being entertained either with his games or videos. And I am enjoying the company and someone to chat to about everything that is occurring. I love Ian's view on what is going on. He is definitely my little buddy and I am enjoying the half day kindergarten that allows us to spend time together. There. I said it. Oh my.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
The Plan.
I've thought long and hard about what I want to do to commemorate this year turning 40. I now have a plan to put in action.
1. Run (walk or crawl if I have to) the Philadelphia Marathon on November 20, 2011. Yes, that's right. I am going for it. 26.2. Oy! I still can't believe I am considering this, but wow, what a feeling it would be to cross that finish line. And, if you don't try, you'll never know if you can succeed.
2. Go Skydiving, ONLY after getting to my goal weight. This could be the reward I need to keep me on track. Jeff made me laugh pretty hard when he commented that I will fall to the ground just as fast with or without the extra 35 lbs. But it will be so much sweeter doing it at my goal weight. And as one friend has joked with me, the chalk outline of my body will be smaller.
I am hoping that neither of the above items result in my death. Because that would really suck. I am also hoping that both will be achieved during the year 2011.
I am excited, scared and nervous all at the same time. I go back and forth between thinking I am crazy & insane and heck, why the hell not do this?!??!?!? Registration for the marathon opens on April 1st. I want to confirm that there is no cut-off time (meaning, however long it takes me, there will still be someone there handing out water and clocking my time) and then I'll register. My fabulous husband is behind me 100% and ask that I only put the training schedule on the calendar so that he knows when to expect me getting in an 18 mile or longer (eegaads!) run. And in a wonderful show of support he already added the registration fee into the budget.
OH. MY. G-D. I am going to do this.
1. Run (walk or crawl if I have to) the Philadelphia Marathon on November 20, 2011. Yes, that's right. I am going for it. 26.2. Oy! I still can't believe I am considering this, but wow, what a feeling it would be to cross that finish line. And, if you don't try, you'll never know if you can succeed.
2. Go Skydiving, ONLY after getting to my goal weight. This could be the reward I need to keep me on track. Jeff made me laugh pretty hard when he commented that I will fall to the ground just as fast with or without the extra 35 lbs. But it will be so much sweeter doing it at my goal weight. And as one friend has joked with me, the chalk outline of my body will be smaller.
I am hoping that neither of the above items result in my death. Because that would really suck. I am also hoping that both will be achieved during the year 2011.
I am excited, scared and nervous all at the same time. I go back and forth between thinking I am crazy & insane and heck, why the hell not do this?!??!?!? Registration for the marathon opens on April 1st. I want to confirm that there is no cut-off time (meaning, however long it takes me, there will still be someone there handing out water and clocking my time) and then I'll register. My fabulous husband is behind me 100% and ask that I only put the training schedule on the calendar so that he knows when to expect me getting in an 18 mile or longer (eegaads!) run. And in a wonderful show of support he already added the registration fee into the budget.
OH. MY. G-D. I am going to do this.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
It's time for Shabbat
Usually by the time Friday evening comes, I am spent. It's undoubtedly been a long week and I am ready for the swing shift (Jeff) to come in and help out during Saturday and Sunday. Now that Sam is no longer napping in the afternoons, Friday evenings find me even more exhausted than usual.
Once a month, my Friday evenings have become fun again! Amy, a fabulous mommy friend came up with a great idea. She sent an email asking 4 other families if we would like to rotate to each of our houses and host a Shabbat dinner. What an awesome idea! I replied my Toppall team is in and I'll volunteer for us to go first. I wanted to get it over with and not have anxiety waiting months and months for our turn. However, any anxiety I was forgoing, became fraught with other worries --
1. How in the world would I fit 10 adults and 12 kids in my house for dinner?
2. What in the world could I make us all to eat?
3. Where is everyone going to sit?
4. Was I overscheduling myself because I also volunteered to bring dinner to a friend & her family for that same evening?
One by one, I tackled all the challenges and everything turned out great. Fantastic, if I do say so myself. It helped that I literally wrote out my Thursday and Friday schedule in one hour increments, starting at 6:00am and ending at 7:45pm. I needed to make sure I could fit everything in and make the most of the time I had. Many thanks are given to Kelly (does she come to my rescue weekly or what!?!?) for letting me borrow not one, but two kids-sized tables with chairs. This gave all the kids a place to sit. And, because one family ended up cancelling, I had enough spots for all 8 adults to sit at my dining room table. In the end we had a total of 8 adults and 9 kids. I was very nervous when I got a text from one of the moms asking if they could bring anything. And when the phone rang at 5:00pm with a similar question from another family, I thought both times that someone else was cancelling. Fortunately this was not the case.
More thanks can also be given to Let's Dish. It was this brilliant idea to get the Lemon Chicken with Asparagus and Rice and not need to order the pizzas I originally thought might be a good idea. (hahaha, just kidding). The dish took 35 minutes to make and I think was a crowd pleaser. I put a salad and of course, challah with the dinner and I felt pretty good about it all coming together. I made the kids steamed broccoli, chicken nuggets and noodles with parmesan and butter. Ding, ding, ding we had a winner.
I am in love with this tradition we've started. Jeff and I aren't overly religious, but we want the kids to know they are Jewish and to celebrate the various holidays. We did the prayer over the bread and candles. All the kids chanted along. It was a great way to end the crazy, busy week I call my life. Be among good friends and have the kids learn a little more about what it is to be Jewish. Every tradition has to start somewhere. And I am glad we got this one going.
Jeff and I earlier in the day were trying to guess what time we thought everyone would leave. He said 7:30pm and I said, "No way, 7:00pm. All the kids go to bed in the 7:00pm hour and everyone still has to drive home." To our delight, no one left before 8:30pm. Wowee! I'd say that alone showed the evening was a success.
So now I can breathe easy for the next 4 months until it is our turn again. I feel like a full-fledged grown-up. I even had a tablecloth on the table!
Once a month, my Friday evenings have become fun again! Amy, a fabulous mommy friend came up with a great idea. She sent an email asking 4 other families if we would like to rotate to each of our houses and host a Shabbat dinner. What an awesome idea! I replied my Toppall team is in and I'll volunteer for us to go first. I wanted to get it over with and not have anxiety waiting months and months for our turn. However, any anxiety I was forgoing, became fraught with other worries --
1. How in the world would I fit 10 adults and 12 kids in my house for dinner?
2. What in the world could I make us all to eat?
3. Where is everyone going to sit?
4. Was I overscheduling myself because I also volunteered to bring dinner to a friend & her family for that same evening?
One by one, I tackled all the challenges and everything turned out great. Fantastic, if I do say so myself. It helped that I literally wrote out my Thursday and Friday schedule in one hour increments, starting at 6:00am and ending at 7:45pm. I needed to make sure I could fit everything in and make the most of the time I had. Many thanks are given to Kelly (does she come to my rescue weekly or what!?!?) for letting me borrow not one, but two kids-sized tables with chairs. This gave all the kids a place to sit. And, because one family ended up cancelling, I had enough spots for all 8 adults to sit at my dining room table. In the end we had a total of 8 adults and 9 kids. I was very nervous when I got a text from one of the moms asking if they could bring anything. And when the phone rang at 5:00pm with a similar question from another family, I thought both times that someone else was cancelling. Fortunately this was not the case.
More thanks can also be given to Let's Dish. It was this brilliant idea to get the Lemon Chicken with Asparagus and Rice and not need to order the pizzas I originally thought might be a good idea. (hahaha, just kidding). The dish took 35 minutes to make and I think was a crowd pleaser. I put a salad and of course, challah with the dinner and I felt pretty good about it all coming together. I made the kids steamed broccoli, chicken nuggets and noodles with parmesan and butter. Ding, ding, ding we had a winner.
I am in love with this tradition we've started. Jeff and I aren't overly religious, but we want the kids to know they are Jewish and to celebrate the various holidays. We did the prayer over the bread and candles. All the kids chanted along. It was a great way to end the crazy, busy week I call my life. Be among good friends and have the kids learn a little more about what it is to be Jewish. Every tradition has to start somewhere. And I am glad we got this one going.
Jeff and I earlier in the day were trying to guess what time we thought everyone would leave. He said 7:30pm and I said, "No way, 7:00pm. All the kids go to bed in the 7:00pm hour and everyone still has to drive home." To our delight, no one left before 8:30pm. Wowee! I'd say that alone showed the evening was a success.
So now I can breathe easy for the next 4 months until it is our turn again. I feel like a full-fledged grown-up. I even had a tablecloth on the table!
Friday, January 7, 2011
Weight Watchers - Month 1 (frustrated)
As mentioned earlier, I joined WW again and more determined than ever to make this work and finally achieve my dream of hitting my goal weight. I will give a recap each month on how I am doing. So, how am I doing? I am more frustrated than ever!
# of lbs looking to lose: 36.4
Week 1 - lost 5 lbs
Week 2 - lost .2 lbs
Week 3 - didn't weigh in because it was New Year's and a crazy week for me
Week 4 - gained 1.8 lbs
TOTAL Weight loss to date: 3.4 lbs
Total left to lose: 33 lbs
Being the optimistic that I am, I will first focus on the positive and be thankful that I did not gain 3.4 lbs over the holiday season. I am also thankful that I am back on track and living a very healthy and active lifestyle.
However, this is where I am ridiculously frustrated. This past week has been stellar in terms of tracking, making healthy eating choices and getting the exercise in. In addition to following the training program to build up to 10 miles running (this week I had 3 runs at 2 miles each), I am also meeting a few of the Burke Moms to walk 3 miles each evening, and I am alternating days between a kettle bell workout at the gym and the EA Active 2 Wii workout at home. So basically on any given day, I am doing 3 complete workouts.
I am not eating the exercise points I am getting. I don't believe in this. But, I am also dipping into the 49 weekly flex points so maybe you could look at as if I am eating some of the exercise points.
If someone came to me with this exact problem, I'd tell them they are not eating enough and their body is in starvation mode. I am just having a hard time believing this is the case with me. Maybe if I was at a plateau or barely losing anything each week, but to be gaining 1.8 lbs? Really? I don't get it. Each morning the scale is going up, up, up. How is that possible when I have burned at least 1/2 if not 2/3rds of the calories I am eating?
Honestly I can't do more than I am doing. I leave the gym with no regrets. I am religiously tracking and measuring everything I eat.
I refuse to give up. I will give this another week at the same intensity before I figure out what changes to make.
Back to the optimism - Yay!! 3.4 lbs in a month is pretty good. I shouldn't complain. And since this is a marathon, not a sprint, I'll happily take a 3.4 lb loss each month. That would mean I could hit my goal weight in 10.5 months (October 2011). Now, I just have to stop the scale moving in the wrong direction.
# of lbs looking to lose: 36.4
Week 1 - lost 5 lbs
Week 2 - lost .2 lbs
Week 3 - didn't weigh in because it was New Year's and a crazy week for me
Week 4 - gained 1.8 lbs
TOTAL Weight loss to date: 3.4 lbs
Total left to lose: 33 lbs
Being the optimistic that I am, I will first focus on the positive and be thankful that I did not gain 3.4 lbs over the holiday season. I am also thankful that I am back on track and living a very healthy and active lifestyle.
However, this is where I am ridiculously frustrated. This past week has been stellar in terms of tracking, making healthy eating choices and getting the exercise in. In addition to following the training program to build up to 10 miles running (this week I had 3 runs at 2 miles each), I am also meeting a few of the Burke Moms to walk 3 miles each evening, and I am alternating days between a kettle bell workout at the gym and the EA Active 2 Wii workout at home. So basically on any given day, I am doing 3 complete workouts.
I am not eating the exercise points I am getting. I don't believe in this. But, I am also dipping into the 49 weekly flex points so maybe you could look at as if I am eating some of the exercise points.
If someone came to me with this exact problem, I'd tell them they are not eating enough and their body is in starvation mode. I am just having a hard time believing this is the case with me. Maybe if I was at a plateau or barely losing anything each week, but to be gaining 1.8 lbs? Really? I don't get it. Each morning the scale is going up, up, up. How is that possible when I have burned at least 1/2 if not 2/3rds of the calories I am eating?
Honestly I can't do more than I am doing. I leave the gym with no regrets. I am religiously tracking and measuring everything I eat.
I refuse to give up. I will give this another week at the same intensity before I figure out what changes to make.
Back to the optimism - Yay!! 3.4 lbs in a month is pretty good. I shouldn't complain. And since this is a marathon, not a sprint, I'll happily take a 3.4 lb loss each month. That would mean I could hit my goal weight in 10.5 months (October 2011). Now, I just have to stop the scale moving in the wrong direction.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
26.2
I am reading a book right now called, "The Nonrunner's Marathon Guide for Women: Get off your butt and on with your training."
In a million years I never thought I could do a marathon. Heck, I am not sure I even want to do a marathon. The amount of training involved is very time-intensive. Not to mention, that race day is spent pretty much all day long running. I am almost certain it would take me at least 6 hours (if not more) to cross the finish line. It really doesn't sound like my idea of a good time. Do you know how many meals you would miss in 6+ hours?
However, I've been looking for something a bit over-the-top and spectacular to do to commemorate the year I turn 40. I've been spending a lot of time, usually at night when I should be sleeping and not spending time listening to Samantha scream/cry in her sleep, trying to come up with ideas. I want something that is going beyond my comfort zone and is a once-in-a-lifetime type activity. Something that when its over, I will have felt it was worthy to wait 40 years to accomplish.
I've got a few contenders I am considering, but nothing that requires the discipline and training a marathon involves. And other than skydiving, I am not sure the finish would be as exhilarating either.
Anyway, this book I am reading is pretty damn inspiring. As I am reading it, I can envision myself actually running a marathon. And I am not a runner!! Yes, I know I've dabbled in running some 5ks, 10ks, and did the Cherry Blossom 10 Miler twice, but when I tell you, that every single step is a struggle, it is. Running does not come easy to me. It takes all my effort and will power to keep one foot in front of another and then repeat, repeat and oh yeah, repeat again. It is a sport that I do solely based on the feeling I get when it is over. That rush of adrenaline that I just did something I never thought possible. Something that a large part of the population wishes they could get off the couch and do.
I may not run the fastest or farthest, but I am pushing myself every time I am out there. I am competing only against me, no one else. I strive to do better than my last run. A lot of the time this is not the case, but I never give up trying. It's all mental with me, and the mind games I play go a long way to helping me achieve my goal. Simply to finish.
I am really enjoying the book. It is very funny and written by someone that I think I could be good friends with. She breaks it down and is incredibly relatable. She is not an athlete or some kind of fitness super-hero. When she started her training, she wasn't even a runner either.
I am so intrigued. Very, very intrigued. But is it enough to commit? Is this going to my icing on the cake?
In a million years I never thought I could do a marathon. Heck, I am not sure I even want to do a marathon. The amount of training involved is very time-intensive. Not to mention, that race day is spent pretty much all day long running. I am almost certain it would take me at least 6 hours (if not more) to cross the finish line. It really doesn't sound like my idea of a good time. Do you know how many meals you would miss in 6+ hours?
However, I've been looking for something a bit over-the-top and spectacular to do to commemorate the year I turn 40. I've been spending a lot of time, usually at night when I should be sleeping and not spending time listening to Samantha scream/cry in her sleep, trying to come up with ideas. I want something that is going beyond my comfort zone and is a once-in-a-lifetime type activity. Something that when its over, I will have felt it was worthy to wait 40 years to accomplish.
I've got a few contenders I am considering, but nothing that requires the discipline and training a marathon involves. And other than skydiving, I am not sure the finish would be as exhilarating either.
Anyway, this book I am reading is pretty damn inspiring. As I am reading it, I can envision myself actually running a marathon. And I am not a runner!! Yes, I know I've dabbled in running some 5ks, 10ks, and did the Cherry Blossom 10 Miler twice, but when I tell you, that every single step is a struggle, it is. Running does not come easy to me. It takes all my effort and will power to keep one foot in front of another and then repeat, repeat and oh yeah, repeat again. It is a sport that I do solely based on the feeling I get when it is over. That rush of adrenaline that I just did something I never thought possible. Something that a large part of the population wishes they could get off the couch and do.
I may not run the fastest or farthest, but I am pushing myself every time I am out there. I am competing only against me, no one else. I strive to do better than my last run. A lot of the time this is not the case, but I never give up trying. It's all mental with me, and the mind games I play go a long way to helping me achieve my goal. Simply to finish.
I am really enjoying the book. It is very funny and written by someone that I think I could be good friends with. She breaks it down and is incredibly relatable. She is not an athlete or some kind of fitness super-hero. When she started her training, she wasn't even a runner either.
I am so intrigued. Very, very intrigued. But is it enough to commit? Is this going to my icing on the cake?
Monday, January 3, 2011
Heard and Observed XVIII
Ian: I just want to go to my room for some alone time. I want to be lonely.
***********************************************************************************
We were eating lunch at Chick-fil-a near the Dulles Expo Center. Right outside the window, Ian could see the neighboring restaurant. He quickly read and identified the "Pizza Hut" sign, but had trouble sounding out the sign right next to it. He sees the first letter and wants so hard to guess the word without sounding it out.
"Taco Barn"?
"Taco Butt"?
Um no Ian, it's "Taco Bell".
**********************************************************************************
We had to leave Sam and Ian with someone new to watch them for New Year's Eve, as our regular sitter was not available. Sam was not happy about the switch and when she saw Jeff & me put on our coats, she said to me "Go with you Mommy, go with you." I replied back, "No Sam, you are staying here with the babysitter."
Sam: "And I don't want a baby sister either."
***********************************************************************************
We were eating lunch at Chick-fil-a near the Dulles Expo Center. Right outside the window, Ian could see the neighboring restaurant. He quickly read and identified the "Pizza Hut" sign, but had trouble sounding out the sign right next to it. He sees the first letter and wants so hard to guess the word without sounding it out.
"Taco Barn"?
"Taco Butt"?
Um no Ian, it's "Taco Bell".
**********************************************************************************
We had to leave Sam and Ian with someone new to watch them for New Year's Eve, as our regular sitter was not available. Sam was not happy about the switch and when she saw Jeff & me put on our coats, she said to me "Go with you Mommy, go with you." I replied back, "No Sam, you are staying here with the babysitter."
Sam: "And I don't want a baby sister either."
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Getting by with a little help from my friends
Earlier this week I experienced a period of complete and utter turmoil, stress and frustration trying to parent Sam. My recent blog "Going crazy", detailed a little of what I am going through and what a handful my 2.5 year old is.
That morning, I received one of the greatest delights in my 'Winter break from Hell' and it turned not only my day around, but gave me the strength to continue on & survive. One of the best friends any woman could have (with or without children) is named Jennifer W. We had on the calendar a scheduled drop-off playdate for Ian, at 10:00am at her house. After getting in a quick work-out at the gym (more to escape actual parenting than anything else), I drove to Jen's house and walked Ian to the door. Jen inquired about Sam and asked if I was dropping her off too. WHAT!?!?! Didn't Jen get the memo, or watch the news or hear the screaming from our house to hers on what I am going thru daily? Was she really serious that she wanted Sam too? I thought I was hearing things. After I confirmed that Sam was invited too, I started tearing up. This was exactly the break that was needed. In a very big way.
I believe that Sam was incredibly happy to be getting a break from me too, because when I went to get her out of the car, she ran to Jen's front door and didn't look back. I think I may have heard a "bye-bye Mommy" come out of her mouth as she passed me by.
I am not sure if Jen realized just how necessary this drop-off playdate was to my mental well-being. But, she literally saved me that day. I am sure at some point I would've had to call Jeff to come home early and let me go somewhere by myself to escape. Yes, I hit my breaking point.
When I went to go pick the kids up (at 3:00pm!!!!!!!), of course the reports come back that Sam was an angel. I would much rather her be troublesome with me and no one else, especially a friend I am very fond of. But still, I feel like I am doing something wrong. Yes, I know this is just a stage and she will eventually grow out of it. Jen has been kind enough to offer to have her over anytime I feel like I am about to lose it. Um, that would mean Sam moves in with you for the next 6 months or so. :) And while you are it, can you tackle potty training too?
Later that afternoon, my other amazing friend Kelly, called and said, "I just read your blog. I know this is really late notice, but would you like to go the movies tonight?" My reply? "Yes! I could sit in a dark theatre right now and have nothing play on the screen and it would be time well spent." We saw the movie, "How do you know". Very cute movie and my fantastic, well-relaxed, non-stressed mood continued a little longer.
I owe so much to my mommy friends. I really think it takes a village to be a stay-at-home-mom. I feel so fortunate to have an incredible support group that keeps me going. These friendships I have formed go beyond us having kids in common. They aren't getting rid of me anytime soon no matter how old our kids get. I honestly don't know if I'd be able do this job solo. Nor do I ever want to find out. Thank you Jen and Kelly -- I love you guys!
That morning, I received one of the greatest delights in my 'Winter break from Hell' and it turned not only my day around, but gave me the strength to continue on & survive. One of the best friends any woman could have (with or without children) is named Jennifer W. We had on the calendar a scheduled drop-off playdate for Ian, at 10:00am at her house. After getting in a quick work-out at the gym (more to escape actual parenting than anything else), I drove to Jen's house and walked Ian to the door. Jen inquired about Sam and asked if I was dropping her off too. WHAT!?!?! Didn't Jen get the memo, or watch the news or hear the screaming from our house to hers on what I am going thru daily? Was she really serious that she wanted Sam too? I thought I was hearing things. After I confirmed that Sam was invited too, I started tearing up. This was exactly the break that was needed. In a very big way.
I believe that Sam was incredibly happy to be getting a break from me too, because when I went to get her out of the car, she ran to Jen's front door and didn't look back. I think I may have heard a "bye-bye Mommy" come out of her mouth as she passed me by.
I am not sure if Jen realized just how necessary this drop-off playdate was to my mental well-being. But, she literally saved me that day. I am sure at some point I would've had to call Jeff to come home early and let me go somewhere by myself to escape. Yes, I hit my breaking point.
When I went to go pick the kids up (at 3:00pm!!!!!!!), of course the reports come back that Sam was an angel. I would much rather her be troublesome with me and no one else, especially a friend I am very fond of. But still, I feel like I am doing something wrong. Yes, I know this is just a stage and she will eventually grow out of it. Jen has been kind enough to offer to have her over anytime I feel like I am about to lose it. Um, that would mean Sam moves in with you for the next 6 months or so. :) And while you are it, can you tackle potty training too?
Later that afternoon, my other amazing friend Kelly, called and said, "I just read your blog. I know this is really late notice, but would you like to go the movies tonight?" My reply? "Yes! I could sit in a dark theatre right now and have nothing play on the screen and it would be time well spent." We saw the movie, "How do you know". Very cute movie and my fantastic, well-relaxed, non-stressed mood continued a little longer.
I owe so much to my mommy friends. I really think it takes a village to be a stay-at-home-mom. I feel so fortunate to have an incredible support group that keeps me going. These friendships I have formed go beyond us having kids in common. They aren't getting rid of me anytime soon no matter how old our kids get. I honestly don't know if I'd be able do this job solo. Nor do I ever want to find out. Thank you Jen and Kelly -- I love you guys!
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