Thank you.

My last post, "Getting help." created a flood of phone calls, texts, replies and emails.  I want to say thank you to each and everyone of you.  It made me feel so good to know how much you care. 

Your kind words and concern melted my heart.  One text came across my phone while I was at the post office.  I am sure people in line with me thought I was getting dumped via my cell phone because I instantly teared up reading this very sweet message.

My mom had the best suggestion ever and called to request I send Sam down to her for a few weeks and thus, give me a break.  While shipping her off isn't practical and not going to help me in the long term, I was incredibly touched and of course, burst into tears at the mere thought of it.  Yes, I am that emotional right now.

I am working on getting better and mentally stronger.  I've got a call into a therapist to schedule an appointment.  If we click, then I will hopefully be able to see her weekly. And if I need to find someone else, then I will do that too.  Also, if it turns out medication is recommended, I am open to that idea as well.  For the moment I am hoping that talking with a licensed professional is enough.  Lastly, I am going to plan a long weekend getaway and go back home for a bit of a break.  I think it will do me a world of good to see the family, completely relax and if I want to not talk to anyone for 72 hours, so be it.  Plus, some of my mom's cooking will be a nice touch.  Jeff recommended I go as soon as possible, but I think leaving town before the marathon (11/20) will be more stressful than helpful.  I am sure this marathon training is contributing to some of my worn-out, exhausted state, but I am determined to see this until the end.  I've made it priority #1 and I can't go away for a long weekend and mess with that.  So as of now, I'll go the first weekend in December.

Meanwhile, I am still working with Sam and getting her help too.  Together, we will come out of this healthier, stronger.  I do realize it is not all her fault and a large part, is me not dealing with it as well as I could have.  As my mom accurately pointed out, Sam senses that I am stressed and reacts to this too.

Thank you for making me realize I am not alone.  We all go through this at one time or another.  Parenting is hard.   For what its worth, Sam and I had a great day together yesterday.  Each day is a new day to get it right.