Another 365 days have come and gone. I blink and there goes another year.
It's time now for the 2013 wrap-up.
Travel in 2013:
January - Orlando with Ian
February - Orlando*
March - Orlando with Sam
April - Great Wolf Lodge with the whole family
June - A week at the beach in Emerald Isle, NC (me and the kids)
July - Kids at Jeff's parents for 3 days.
July - Cherry Hill, NJ to see relatives with the whole family
July - Girls weekend to Solomon's Island*
July - Kids in Orlando for 11 days, I was there for 5 of the days.
July - Annapolis (Robyn and Jeff)
August - Philadelphia (me and the kids)
September - Orlando for Lori's baby shower*
September - Hershey, PA with the whole family
October - Girl's weekend to Berkeley Springs, WVA*
November - Orlando with Sam
November - Kids at Jeff's parents for the night
December - Orlando with the whole family
*Represents trips taken solo
As I write this, I am feeling hopeful and inspired. We've been making some progress with Sam's explosive behavior. I am not sure if its because she is in play therapy once a week or if she is just getting older. Don't get me wrong though, she can still be very demanding and whiny. The whining is the kind of noise that is akin to nails scratching down a blackboard or a cat being tortured. She is doing great in school and willingly goes each morning. Whew! Believe me, I know this could've been a major battle if she decided she didn't want to be there. However, she lets everyone know school is not her most favorite place to be. The only thing she likes about her time there is when its time to go home. I still wait for that little light bulb that will go off over head when she realizes a trip to the school nurse will get her an early dismissal. There are so many instances when the sweet and loving Sam comes shining through. When she sees you get hurt and starts kissing your boo-boo. Or, when she wants to help in the kitchen cooking dinner, raking leaves outside, or snuggle with you on the couch. Those are the moments that you savor and wish would never end. It's just so hard the other times when she is incredibly tempermental and not getting her way.
Samantha has this quirky, colorful, fun-loving sense-of-style. She will put these outfit combinations together that in a million years I would never think of. Somehow it works on her. Think Punky Brewster with this killer instinct to layer items. I've long given up telling her no that doesn't match. Sam knows what she wants to wear every day. She'll ask me what the temperature is going to be and then she goes to work. It mostly drives me crazy, but I do my best to pick my battles. I am ready to pull my hair out when she throws a fit yelling "There is NOTHING I want to wear in my closet." And when I suggest 2 or 3 outfits that she refuses to consider, it only gets more frustrating for the both of us. Sometimes out of the blue Sam will say she only wants to wear something 'basic'. HUH?? Who knew Sam even knew the word 'basic'? Apparently the word basic means sweat pants. Um, yeah! Sam would never have been ok with sweat pants before. I swear she makes this stuff up to push my buttons. And usually within the hour she is ready to completely change her look once or twice right before we have to leave.
Ian continues to be my rockstar. It's hard to not compare the kids' dispositions. Ian is so easy-going and eager to please. We've gotten into a good groove this year with homework for him. It is so nice that Ian mostly does it all on his own. Jeff and I will check it, but Ian doesn't need the hand holding that used to occur in 2nd grade. He enjoys all his creative writing assignments and does a most excellent job of incorporating humor and a unique twist in his stories. They are so entertaining to read.
This year Ian has started to do more things around the house. Beyond giving the bathrooms a light cleaning each Saturday, he nows makes his lunch for school, and gets all his own snacks. He is a huge help with his sister and usually is at her beck and call. Ian loves getting to stay home by himself when he doesn't want to come to his sister's activities or run errands with me. It is a wonderful option to let him have this independence. He feels so grown-up getting to be at home and to be honest, I move faster with only one child.
I was very fortunate this year to travel to Orlando as much as I had. I actually didn't realize that I made it down there 7 times in 12 months until I wrote it in the list above. Yowzer! I am pretty sure I've never gone that many times in one year since I moved up here over 20 years ago. I am so happy I was able to. I wouldn't want it any other way. I miss the family when I am not there and want to spend as much time with them as possible. I had made it a goal from the year before that I wanted to take 3 trips down to FL during the school year; one by myself for a long weekend, and one long weekend with each of the kids on their own. I was able to pull this off and it worked out splendidly. The relatives loved having the one-on-one time and each of the kids did stuff they would love to do without worrying about their sibling enjoying it as well. Astranaut training was the highlight of Ian's weekend and getting made up like a princess at Disney was Samantha's.
In 2013 I proved to myself I am not human when it comes to scheduling. My 4 jobs (preschool, The Crazy Man, and billing for two separate clients) are fitting in nicely with my Mommy life and being there for the kids. So many family and friends have said I was ridiculous for taking all this on, but I have to admit it has worked out nicely.
I had such dispair over my weight last year at this time. It was depressing thinking about my situation. In May I managed to start getting control back and rejoined Weight Watchers. I think this is like my 10th time back. I am happy to say I've steadily lost 30 pounds before I hit a plateau. I've become a bit discouraged and gained a little back, but I am very determined to keep moving in the right direction. This is always going to be a HUGE struggle. So. Not. Fun. Even when was I losing and getting great weigh-in numbers, I'd freak out a little on the inside waiting for it to not be a "good week". In the morning I wake-up and wonder, has the weight I lost found me again? I can't rest easy either way. I have been enjoying my closet and getting to wear some of the smaller sizes that hadn't seen the light of day in sometime. That is always nice when I can change up my wardrobe and not have to go shopping to do it. :)
One of the nicer things that has happened in 2013 is my ability to get back to the gym. I've consistently gone each weekday morning and get back home before Jeff leaves the house at 7:00am. I am thrilled I've been keeping this schedule up for the better part of the year. Yay me! And another acheivement I am proud of is my ability to 'let go'. Jeff has taken on grocery shopping each week. It is one less thing for me to do. I make out the grocery list for our week and Jeff does a wonderful job getting everything. Sometimes I have to look at the groceries getting unloaded with one eye closed, but Jeff has learned quite a bit over the year about checking expiration dates and the correct quantities on items we will realistically consume.
Jeff, without writing too much about him and pisssing him off, is an incredible husband and father. He works very hard to take care of us and make sure we are happy. This past year Jeff was put on a client that is based in Pennsylvania. It requires him to travel periodically for work and be gone anywhere from 1 to 3 nights some weeks. The kids and I do great when Jeff is away, but we do love having him home with us. Due to a costly repair not making sense to do on his Nissan Sentra, Jeff finally got a new car during 2013. I am so excited for him. It was bound to happen eventually and the timing was just near perfect. We made our last preschool payment in May. The new car was obtained at the end of May and payments began at the begining of July.
Looking forward to 2014:
Every now and then I have a moment when I feel like I'm doing an ok job with this mothering thing. In 2013, I had more than a few. For that I am grateful. I hope this continues into 2014. I was able to let some things go and will do my best to live in the moment. For example, I used to try very hard to publish something in this blog every other day, like clockwork. I've managed to drop that self-imposed pressure and be okay with only writing when I truly feel I have the time do so.
My big thing in 2014 is I am not going to rush. This must be Jeff's biggest pet peeve about me. He will see me do everything but get ready, or but start dinner, or but help the kids and then when I do get to it, I rush, rush, rush to catch-up those 10 minutes I should've started that task sooner. Jeff doesn't know this, but it does drive me crazy to feel like I have no time do the one thing I need to do. So if possible I am going to not get as distracted and slow down. Take time to breathe and put more time and myself in whatever the most important thing is that needs to have my attention.
I've been trying to do more random acts of kindness and will continue to keep this up in the coming year. It makes me feel good and I hope I am making a small difference (for the better) in someone's life.
We've had some very fun adventures traveling this past year. I would love to continue exploring new places and creating lots of memories being together. I've given up on doing a family trip to the beach over the Summer. This just isn't going to happen anytime soon. I am coming to terms with that. I think the most I can hope for is that we continue to do a few weekend trips here and there.
Another lofty goal I have is to redo our family room. I would love to get new furniture, paint, put in recessed lighting and update the tv in this room. Jeff and I are slowly doing things around the house, (either cosmetic or home maintenance) and this room is my next big target. After 9 years of living here, it was bound to happen, right?
A New Year's Wish:
Happy 2014 to each and everyone of you reading this. Thank you for continuing to be a source of support, encouragement and friendship.
I hope that you find ways to be good to yourself and not feel guilt when taking a 2nd piece of cake or spending an extra five minutes reading the newspaper. I hope that we all find humor and love and kindness in each day. May 2014 be our best year ever. I love you!
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