Very, very anxious

I am pretty sure my disdain for the words "General Admission" has been written about before.  I have not gotten any better about keeping my emotions in check.  I am happy to stand in line for as long as it takes to put me at the top of the line and enter in first.  But when I enter a theatre and see the first 4 rows have been secretly reserved by crafty individuals, it doesn't make me want to play by the rules. 

My anxiety is at an all time high. I hate the feeling that comes over me.  Of course, it all works out in the end but it doesn't stop me from being bitter and ruin some of the enjoyment of what I'm about to watch.  

The strange thing is, I know this about myself and yet, it doesn't get better.  In fact, when it comes to something so important to me, my anxiety heightens to all new levels. Ugh. I wish in this case admitting it was a big step in the right direction.