I am totally amusing myself with today's blog. I haven't written consistently in a very long time. So sporadic through 2018 and I'm a bit embarrassed that this will only be my 32nd post this year. In my heyday, I never missed my pattern of every other day and easily wrote upwards of 130 to 160 posts a year. I can't start something and not see it thru. And my end of the year wrap up post follows a very consistent formula on how I like to end the year. Even when I don't feel like writing and am not inspired, I still need to do my ending post. I find it very fascinating what I obsess over and what I could care less about.
This past year was a huge one for us. Ian reached the milestone in the Jewish religion that every kid and their parents stress over and get anxious and excited about all at the same time. Ian became a Bar Mitzvah in May. He did an amazing job and made Jeff and I very proud. If I have to give one highlight to 2018, this undoubtedly is it.
I am constantly in awe that I am a mother to a 10 year old and a 13 year old. There is so much more they can do for themselves. One of the better milestones we get to experience is that a babysitter is no longer needed; even when we go out at night. It's not like Jeff and I are always on a date night -- far from it -- but the few times we did have evening plans that did not include the kids, we were comfortable to leave them home alone. Given that we do not have family close by to babysit, hiring a babysitter gets very costly.
Another year has flown by and I hope I've done a better job of keeping up with the hustle and bustle of our lives. Ian pretty much handles his social life now and I just check in with the various parents to make sure they are aware of what the boys are planning. I never thought I'd be "that" parent who questions and monitors everything, but somehow I've become her. It's true what they say, you shouldn't be your kid's best friend; you need to be a parent first and foremost.
Travel this year:
March: Weekend in Pennsylvania for Alexa and Lia's B'nei Mitzvah
March: Niagara Falls (Canada side) and Pittsburgh for 5 days
April: Susanne and I took the boys to NY for the day for Sam's Bar Mitzvah party
May: Robyn in Orlando for 4 days for Meghan's graduation from College
June: Pennsylvania for the day for Uncle Bernard's party
June -July: Ian and Sam in Orlando for 15 days
July: Jeff and Robyn overnight in Pennsylvania for Chelsea's party.
July- August: Both kids at Camp Ramah for 27 days
August: Robyn in MA and VT for 2 days
September: Ian in Nofolk for the weekend for Elijah's Bar Mitzvah
September: Robyn in Orlando for 5 days
November: Ian and Robyn in Pennsylvania and NYC for the weekend for Jonah's Bar Mitzvah
November: Week in Myrtle Beach for Thanksgiving
I always think that we do very little traveling and while it's true we are gone hardly ever for more than 2 or 3 days at a time, and rarely as a family, we do manage to get out of town if all it requires is a road trip. Most of our reasons for getting anywhere in 2018 involved an invitation of some sort and us accepting.
One of our most favorite trips was to Niagara Falls. We went during the kids' spring break and unfortunately some of the stuff we would do wasn't operating yet for the season, but it mattered very little as we had a great time. Looking at the Falls never gets old.
This year I spent only 1 day in NYC and saw two shows: Summer (based on Donna Summer's life) and The Other Josh Cohen. Both were very enjoyable and it made for a very fun and long day in the Big Apple.
We also did not make it to the beach this past Summer. It was just too much on top of the Bar Mitzvah and something had to give. So far its looking promising that we will be able to return to OC, NJ with my cousin and her family this Summer.
Ian began his 2nd year of middle school with no struggles and instantly found himself asking a girl out on a date and getting cast the staring role of the school play, "Rock of Ages". What an exciting time for him. The relationship with the girl never went beyond the first date, but he can now say he's done it and it did go well. However, they decided it would be better to be friends.
Samantha is having a much better time with her studies in 5th grade. The right teacher is everything! Samantha's teacher this year is new to the school and has been fantastic working with Samantha. We do plan to schedule testing with a reading specialist to see if Samantha has something specific that can be diagnosed rather than waiting for her to fall below grade level before the school system will intervene. Horseback riding is still at the top of Sam's list of activities she enjoys. In a most wonderful turn of events, Sam decided to register with Ian's drama group through George Mason University and also do acting. If you ask me, this is where Sam is truly going to shine. The girl can be so dramatic and just needs the right vehicle to let it go free.
I have to say, I am most looking forward to the time I will have with Jeff from 1:30pm to 5:00pm every Saturday from February to June while the kids are at their drama program together. He has plans for us to go grocery shopping or to Costco or wash/vacuum the cars, or clean the house. While I have plans for us to have a late lunch, or early dinner or go to a movie if the timing works out. Ha! Maybe we can compromise and take turns checking off items on each of our lists.
My job at the preschool is still going great. The women I work with are truly wonderful and so much fun to be around. And in the best update I have from the beginning of 2018, I am most pleased to write that I no longer work for the Crazy Man. It was perfect timing to walk away when he moved to Chevy Chase, MD to live in a retirement community. I do talk to him from time to time and enjoy his stories a lot more now on how he is driving others bonkers. I've continued my 5:30am workouts 3x a week. The camaraderie I have with this group of women who show up at 5:30am is very special. They make it worth it to drag myself out of bed on those cold mornings.
Jeff's job continues to give him opportunities to shine on some of their most challenging projects. He enjoys his work, comes home at a reasonable hour (most of the time) and is in a great mood. There is little more you can ask out of a job.
One of the most surprising developments of 2018 is Jeff's desire to cook and bake. Each week Jeff takes the time to research new and interesting recipes and cooks us dinner on Saturday night, complete with a dessert. The kids and I are pleased to report that the vast majority of dishes he attempts are winners and yummy! Jeff now makes homemade pasta! Really.
Lucy is still a key member of Team Toppall. She remains as sweet as ever and loves to cuddle with all of us. She has her routine of when she will jump in bed with Jeff and me (somehow she knows when it is 4:30am!) and loves to put herself to bed each night in Ian's bed. Sam's big thing is to snuggle with her on the couch. Lucy loves us all very much and we can not get enough of her. I am pretty sure if we could be guaranteed a dog as sweet and amazing as Lucy is, Jeff would be the ring leader in bringing home another rescue.
The year ahead in 2019:
I realized as I was writing this that I surround myself with amazing women. From working out, to working at the preschool, to friends I have from the MOMs group I was in from way back, to friends from the preschool years, to friends I have in Orlando, and other friends I have met along the way, I am most fortunate. I feel so blessed to have these women in my life and look forward to my time I spend with them. They make the dark days brighter and give me many reasons to smile. I am fond of saying, it takes a village, and my village is full of the most awesome people ever. I can't think of a single one who I wouldn't answer the phone for in the middle of night and go help them or know they would do the same for me. As 2019 gets underway, I look forward to continuing to grow these friendships.
Ian and Sam are registered for their usual month-long stay at camp this Summer and I am hoping that Jeff and I are able to spend a week to go somewhere. Fingers are crossed that we can make this work.
I am enjoying my time in the afternoons not having to do my 2nd part-time job that day. Its amazing how much the day feels less hectic not having to run around every single minute from job to job to activity to activity. In 2019, I hope to build in more walks with Lucy during these afternoons, getting fresh air and giving us both a chance to stretch our legs. There is no reason I should not be able to do this. I am hoping by writing this, I will be held accountable.
My new thing for Fridays (my free day from preschool) is to go the movies. By myself! Sometimes I get friends to join me, but if its not possible, I will go on my own during the late morning and before the kids get home from school. I am definitely keeping this up in 2019. Going to the movies has to be one of my most favorite things to do.
My New Year's Wish:
I wish for all of us to be compassionate and less judgy. Give someone a hug if it looks like they need it, lend an ear if someone needs to be talk. I have found most people just want to be heard. May 2019 bring us all happiness, many reasons to laugh, and good health. Happy New Year!
