No more Febreze for you!

Allow me to get gross for a minute or two. 

I just found out that Sam has been using Febreze and lots of it.  All on her own, Samantha has decided that it would be ok to keep wearing the same clothing (in this particular case, black capri leggings) over and over and over again without having them washed if she sprayed it with Febreze first.  WHAT??!!??!

OMG!  I don't even know where to start with this one.  How in the world did she figure this out?   It's not like Jeff, Ian or me wear our clothes multiple times without washing it.   Also, at what point did it occur to her that Fabreeze would make it 'clean' again?  And with a closet full of clothes, why can't she manage to pick something that hasn't been worn earlier that week?

I do all of our wash every Friday.  Every single Friday without fail, all of our clothes we wore that week get cleaned.  Sam knows this.  She will never have to wonder when her favorite items will be washed and ready to wear again.  There is no reason for her take matters in to her own hands and "Fabreeze it clean".    Ugh.

Once I discovered what Sam was up to, I told a few of my friends.  They were surprised by her ingenuity and her solution to wanting to wear the same items again.  I don't find it smart.  I find it gross.  And if this is what she is capable of at 9 years old, what will her teen years be like?

Sam and I had a big talk about this and I left her room with the can of Febreze she had nearby. She no longer will have easy access to it.  I hope she realizes the importance of wearing clean clothes.  I told her that she doesn't want to get the reputation as 'The stinky girl'.  She replied, full of attitude, "That would be MY problem".  I don't see it like that at all.  Her problems are my problems too.  And I am nipping this problem in the bud.

Sam's great advice

Our mornings have been getting smoother.  It has taken approximately the 10 weeks since school started for us to achieve the success I was hoping.  Sam now gets dressed on her own; picks out her own clothing, doesn't throw a fit and doesn't whine.  We are not a 100% perfect, but far enough along that I consider this a big check mark on the list for trying to fix our rocky and turbulent mornings.

About a week ago, my friend texted me venting about her two girls and what she goes thru each morning.  She was at her wits end and couldn't take it anymore.  Boy, could I relate! It was exactly identical to what I had been experiencing; from the "I have nothing to wear!", to "I don't want to wear that!", "or that!", "or that!", "or that!", to "I'm not getting dressed!", I didn't even need to read the text messages to know what my friend was saying.  One of her daughters was too young to employ the same tactics I had been doing with Sam, but the other girl was the perfect age to give my strategy a go.

When I picked Sam up from school that afternoon, I decided to try something unique.  I explained to Sam what my mommy friend was going thru and did she have any advice for her?

Sam: She needs to tell her daughter that she will not get breakfast until she comes downstairs dressed for school.  And let her daughter know she will not get involved in any way.  Just ignore her until she is dressed.  She can only ask for help if she needs to know if something matches or needs help with a button or a zipper.   

Oh my gosh!  When I heard Sam's advice, I had a smile from ear to ear.  She totally got it! 

I said to Sam, "Boy, that's great advice!  It really has made our mornings much easier, hasn't it?"

Sam agreed with me.  Consider this obstacle now officially ironed out. 

The Hoodie

Ian has never once cared what clothes I buy him or how he dresses.  He is so not like Sam this way.  When we purchased our treadmill we received $140 in Dick’s Sporting Goods reward cash.  It’s very similar to how Kohl’s cash works.  There is no minimum needed to buy; you can get $140 in merchandise and walk out having not spent another cent.   A few weeks ago I went to Dick’s and got to the register with all my wonderful stuff.  I love shopping not using money.  I calculated almost exactly the amount I needed to spend with the exception of $5.  I was not going to let $5 go unused and grabbed a t-shirt on clearance for Ian.  When I got home and showed Ian, he instantly said he would not wear the shirt I picked out.  Similarly, the shorts I picked out for Jeff were so big that a whole basketball team could fit in there and still have room to play the game.  Both items needed to go back.  Ian said he would like to have hoodie instead.  Ian has never asked for a particular item of clothing before! 

I took Ian with me and we exchanged the t-shirt and the gigantic shorts for a Nike hoodie.  Ian picked it out all on his own.  He had a very specific color and style he wanted.  Maybe he has been hanging around Sam too much. :)

Since this hoodie has come into Ian’s life, he wears it every day.  Yes, Every. Single. Day.  Ian will have on beautiful sweaters and shirts and layer it with the hoodie.  The hoodie that stays on all day long.  No one even realizes he has a variety of other clothing going on underneath.  For all they know, Ian does not own any other clothes and only has this hoodie to his name.  I am allowed to have the hoodie for one day a week to wash it. 

Since Ian has been wearing this hoodie we’ve noticed that boys everywhere are also wearing the same exact hoodie.  It’s like he has twins all over the place.   We saw 3 boys, all about Ian’s age, during our weekend in Orlando.   I wonder if they wear theirs every day too. 

Each morning Jeff and I see Ian wearing THE hoodie, we each comment how we have to get him more to wear.  And yet another week will go by and we haven't expanded his hoodie wardrobe.  Ian doesn't seem to care.  He really LOVES this hoodie.    

It's time for a rant

....And from a page from Crazy Man's book, I've now been influenced enough by him to write a letter of my own.  This burns me up.  What about the customer always being right?  I am done with them. D. O. N. E.  

May 3, 2014

To the owners of ----- Cleaners:

I feel it is important to let you know why I won’t be giving you any future business.  Over the years, I’ve taken my son’s pants (many, many pairs) to get hemmed at your cleaners.  On February 17^th, I brought in 2 pairs of the same exact track pants, in different colors to have tailored.   This past week I noticed both pairs’ hems are starting to unravel.  I ran in to ----- on Friday afternoon to see if they could be fixed.  I was met with resistance from the young lady who always works there.  She indicated that Ian’s pants had got caught on something and it caused the hem to unravel.  I said this was not the case.  There was no way BOTH pairs could’ve gotten caught on something.  It was in a weird spot to be unraveling.  The only way this was happening was the thread was coming loose, ON BOTH PAIRS!!   Then I was told that ----- only guarantees work for one week and this was 2.5 months later.  I assured her that Ian had worn these pants only a handful of times, at the most 4 times since we bought them. 

I asked her again if she could fix them.  She said it would get fixed if I agreed to split the cost.  Seriously?  I was not going to stay there and argue with her.  I took my pants and walked out.  I will not be back. 

I had been a good customer for several years, since you opened the dry cleaners under the new ownership and name.  I value the small business owner and do my best to choose them over a bigger chain.  I can not stay loyal to a company that does not provide good customer service.  I had never brought anything back to be fixed before.  And I’ve never once complained that work on your part was done poorly.  I had been happy up until now and never even questioned what I had been told by my friends were high prices for getting clothes tailored.  I am sorry to say you won’t see me coming back.  I highly suggest you do some research on the business model Nordstrom has made famous for handling their customers.  It’s too small of a town to be treating customers like this. 

Sincerely,

Robyn Toppall

Laundry

I do our wash once a week.  Every Friday, like clockwork, the clothes get washed.  I've gotten used to Ian only having 3 pairs of underwear go through the washing machine and dryer.  No matter how many times I tell him he should be putting on a fresh pair daily, I've come to expect seeing only 3 or 4 pairs (one time it was only 2 pairs!!  Oh my!!).

Sam changes her clothes throughout the day.  She will start with one outfit and usually change her clothes after school once or twice.  Again, another thing I've come to expect with the kids.

This past Friday I go to put Sam's dirty clothes in the washing machine and think to myself, "Wow!  This is a lot of clothing for one week."   Since it didn't look like a lot of clothing was missing from Sam's closet, (a true testament to how much clothing Sam actually has), I didn't fully realize how much clothing was going into the machine. 

As I was folding Sam's clean clothes to put away in her closet, I got an accurate picture of just how much she went through in one week.  Remember, this is one week!! 

32 hangers of items (each hanger contains a complete outfit of a matching top/bottom or dress)
6 pairs of leggings (granted some of the leggings may have been worn with some of the dresses)
2 pairs of jeans
4 t-shirts
2 sweaters
3 pairs of shorts
1 bathing suit (At no point was she near a pool)
7 pairs of pajamas
Underwear/socks

I find the above list RIDICULOUS!!!!!!  This is pure craziness!!  Is it because she is a girl and this is a 'girl thing'?  YOWZER!

Either Sam is bipolar (a bathing suit, really?!?!) or she is practicing to be an award show host.  I just wonder if she will be changing her clothes this much when it comes time for her to do her own wash.

Friends.

I feel like I am back in school, elementary school that is.  Between Ian's 3rd grade math and Sam socializing in Kindergarten, I've been transported back to the 1970's.

I've discovered that Sam is shy.  Painfully shy.  I didn't realize how bad this was until kindergarten started.  She had an amazing group of friends all through preschool, but none of them went to the same elementary school as her.  It was time for her to start over.  It's not like she was going to stop being friends with her preschool crowd (they will be friends forever!!), but she definitely needed to have a friend or two to hang out with during school.  Sam needed to figure out how to make friends.  Each day she came home from school, I'd ask her about her day and who she played with.  Sam would shrug her shoulders and not really give me an answer.  My Mama Bear instincts came out in full force and I was determined to make Sam a friend during Back-to-School night.  As moms were filing into the kindergarten room I asked a few if they had a daughter or son in the class.  Once I found a mom of a little girl, I said we need to get a playdate scheduled ASAP!   It turns out that this mom also has a son who is in 3rd grade.  Ian knew him and they've played together from time to time during recess.  We scheduled a date to go bowling with all the kids.  A friendship between Sam and her daughter, Michela was forming. Yay!

Sam started talking about Michela and another girl named Courtney.  It was great hearing Sam telling me what was going in Kindergarten and hearing about these girls.  Ian even spotted Sam braiding Courtney's hair during lunch one day.

We had TWIN DAY at school coming up.  I never got into any of these themed dress-up days before with Ian.  He always handled it on his own. Ian would coordinate which baseball jersey the boys in his class would wear and they would show up at school ready to go.  For some reason I am much more protective of my daughter and was scared she'd be the odd duck out.  I couldn't let that happen.  I asked Sam if she wanted me to email Courtney's mom and see if they could dress alike.  Sam said yes.  When I sent the email I offered to go to Target and buy matching shirts.  I said it would be my pleasure to treat Courtney.  I got a pretty quick response from Courtney's mom.  She was very receptive to the girls dressing like twins.  Only my suggestion of keeping it easy by going to Target turned into a big-time shopping date at Gymboree at the mall.  Sam was overjoyed when she heard her and Courtney could pick out their outfit together.  We met at the mall on Monday afternoon (MLK day holiday) just in time before getting school cancelled for the next 3 days.  Fortunately Friday we only had a 2 hour delay and the girls dressed exactly alike for TWIN DAY.



Sam and Courtney having fun shopping together for matching outfits.

The cutest thing was when the phone rang on Friday morning.  I answered it to hear to Ian's friend Jack, in a shaky, timid 8 year old voice ask for Ian to come to the phone.  Jack wanted to confirm with Ian which baseball player's shirt they were all going to wear.  The boys decided on Strausburg. 

Sam and Courtney were the hit of kindergarten.  I can now breathe a sigh of relief that she has a couple of friends.  That is until next year when she ends up in different class than Courtney and Michela and I may have to start this making friends thing all over again.  It's a good thing I am good at it. :)

As for 3rd grade math and kindergarten sight words, I am still in elementary school hell. 

Sam in her TWIN DAY clothes. 
This is what the girls picked to wear.

The Black Short Drama

Sam has been taking a dance class on Wednesday afternoons for over a year and a half.  She loves it and its the one thing in her life she has never said she wants to quit.  The class consists of her and 3 of her best girl friends.  Sam takes the class very seriously and will practice new moves all week long. 

The dance class is very laid-back and low key compared to other dance studios in Fairfax County.  There are no big recitals each year or crazy costumes requiring the parents to spend a ton of money on a 4 minute performance up on a stage. 

The class is held at the Lorton Workhouse and each summer, they do an ice cream social.  You can buy a bowl one of the artist's made and get it filled with ice cream.  Additionally, you can wander around all the galleries and check out the various artists and their work.  It's a great idea.  And would be a better idea in the Fall.

This year, they wanted the two dance classes (Sam's and the one right after it with the kids 2 years older) to perform.  Yes, outside.  And the day this occurred, it was 104 degrees out.  Sam and all the other kids were a trooper and did an amazing job.  I am very proud of my little girl.  She was focused, had a smile on her face and did all the moves, despite melting at the time.  It was super cute.

The outfit Sam's dance teacher wanted everyone to wear was black shorts and any solid, color t-shirt.  Like I mentioned earlier, this is very low-key.   Of course, this combination of clothing did not get decided until I was out of town.  Jeff ran to Kohl's and found some black shorts.  My friend Stefanie ran to Target and found two more styles of black shorts.  She made sure to buy double of everything so in case Jeff didn't find anything, Sam would be covered. 

When I got back home, I laid out all 3 pairs of black shorts and told Sam to pick which pair she would want to wear.  She took a careful look and decided to go with BOTH pairs that Stefanie found. Yes!  Sam wore not one, but two pairs of black shorts at the same time.  And this is just the way she rolls. 

It's quite interesting Sam's sense of style.  She actually took the small, hoochy-mama pair (but very cute with these little bows on the side) and put them over the longer, biker style shorts.  I was impressed with Sam's ability to put together this look.   It is quite cool how this sense of fashion came natural to her.

A picture of Sam on stage, outside in 104 degree heat,
wearing both pairs of black shorts.

Cool.

I remember just a day after Ian was born, it was my mom and me in the hospital room hanging out.  We were in awe of this little life that had been created and couldn't stop looking at him.  We began dreaming out loud our plans for Ian.  We were determined that this child was not going to grow up to be a dork and in no way, was going to do anything that would get him made fun of by the other kids.  We quickly came up with a list of things that would guarantee him to be one of the 'cool' kids.

1. He's got a great name.  Ian.  It's not like we named him Stanley or Hubert.
2. Make sure he always has a stylish haircut.  No mullet or something that looks like I did it myself.
3. If Ian ever needs glasses, Ian's glasses would look good for his face, or get him contacts or lasik if he wanted.
4. His clothes would be current.  Not necessarily trendy, but his clothing would never be the cause of something that could get made fun of.

There might have been one or two more items for the list, but I can't think of them at the moment.  I do know that when I see a really cool shirt, I have to get it for him.  Convincing Ian to wear it is another matter all together.  It sometimes takes a little bribery until he wears it that first time to school and then everyone tells him how cool his shirt is.  After that, there is no convincing or bribes needed for Ian to wear the shirt again. 

Exhibit A.  How great is this shirt? 

There aren't that many great boys clothes out there.  When you see something this good, you've got to jump on it and get it.  I think this is my most favorite item of Ian's clothing.  Now I just need to tell him that it's not necessary to have the buttons all done up to the top.  Just because you now know how to button something, you don't have to do take it to the extreme. It's just not cool.  :)

Yes, this is what I am dealing with.

The kids and I met up with some friends for a bowling playdate.  Both Ian and Sam love to bowl and it is a fun way to spend the afternoon when I get to catch up with one of my favorite mommy friends.  I knew in advance that Sam was probably not going to want to wear the bowling shoes.  I was mentally prepared for this and waited for her to request the shoes after seeing her brother and friends put theirs on.  I got Sam the correct size and put them on her feet.  Sam was in some kind of mood and nothing was making her happy.  After taking her turn bowling, she flung herself on the floor and picked-up her temper tantrum from where she left off before her turn.  She took off her bowling shoes and  as threw them, she yelled, "I can't wear these.  They are too comfortable." 

Really?  What in the world do I do with that information?  Yes, folks, this is what I am dealing with.  G-d help us all.

*************************************************************************

I picked Sam up from school one day and she was wearing different bottoms than what I dropped her off in that morning.  Sam saw me at the doorway and ran, yelling in excitement, "I pooped, Mommy!  I pooped!"  As the teacher explained, she didn't make it quite in time to the bathroom and they had to put her back-up pants on her. 

Before I could say, "Yay" to Sam for pooping, Sam burst into a hysterical cry and I picked her up to console her.  I asked her why she was crying and once she caught her breath, Sam said, "My pants don't match my shirt."

Oh my.

Good help is easy to find, if you know where to look

Sam loves taking care of her brother Ian. At just 17 months, she is proving to be a good mommy.

On the rare occasion that I am the one to give the kids their bath, I take the most efficient route possible and bathe them together. No one ever tells you how great this is when deciding to give your only child a sibling. But being able to bathe two kids at once is a wonderful thing! You have both kids in one place, they are getting clean and having fun playing -- all at the same time. What can be better? Since Ian is a boy and Samantha is a girl, I know bathing them together can't go on for much longer, but for the time being, I do enjoy it.

Once the bath is over, I'll take Samantha out first, get her dry and pajamas on. Then I'll go back to the bathtub and get Ian. While I am doing this, Sam goes into Ian's room and pulls out a pair of pajamas for him to wear. I guess I did something right years ago, when I put his pajamas in the bottom drawer!

In the morning, Ian gets up very early and heads downstairs first thing. By the time I catch up and bring him clothes to change into, Sam has helped and given her input. Once Ian makes it into the bathroom (when taking off his pjs he realizes he needs to go pee), Sam is right there, meeting him at the bathroom door, holding out underwear for him to put on. She then goes to get his pants and hands them to him, and then, last but not least, she will give him his shirt/sweater. With each item, she holds out it to him and says "this...this...this...this" until he takes it from her and puts it on.

And, when I shout out "Ian, it's time to get your socks and shoes on." Guess who is the first one bringing him his socks? Yes, it's Sam. Most of the time she is faster than him.

The only thing Sam asks for in return for this help is a bite (or two, or three) of whatever he is eating. I guess her food never looks as good as what he has.